On being conditioned

Like probably most, I'm a creature of habit. And habits, as we all know, are hard to break.

Some years ago, I started to visit places I only had the vaguest idea of. And that was precisely the reason I wanted to explore them – with as little prior knowledge as possible. The idea behind it was (and still is) to simply expose myself to an unknown environment, and to experience how this exposure would affect me. Pretty much the only thing I inquired before embarking on my trip was the weather conditions. And, I also booked a hotel.

Although not being informed about my destination, I nevertheless have quite some unconscious expectations. I imagined, for instance, to explore Albania by train but then had to discover that there were no trains but only buses.

I'm going to Mulhouse, I told my friend Virginia, who suggested to visit le marché arabe. You must be from Germany or Switzerland, the young woman at the tourist information said, for these are the only ones who speak of le marché arabe. Well, how do you call it then? Le marché. What else did I want to visit?, she asked. Nothing in particular, I retorted, and added that I felt quite content just strolling around and take pictures. I see, she said, yet I'd suggest to visit the Cité Manifeste, the most important workers' housing estate outside England from the 19^th century, supplemented with new buildings.

Needless to say, that sounded not only interesting but definitely worth visiting. And so I started to walk into the direction indicated but soon realised that after a while there were no more European faces to be seen. Blacks and Arabs seemed to dominate the area; they did not appear hostile but friendly they were neither. I turned around yet I couldn't get the Cité Manifeste out of my head, it felt like I had to visit it. My mind had been taken over by a cultural imperative (how can you be in Mulhouse and not go see this?) that I could not rid myself off.

Rarely has it been more apparent to me how conditioned I go through life. My culture, represented by schools and the various media, tells me what I should myself concern with. It is a must-imperative – you must this, you must that – that governs my life. And although I didnt feel like visiting the Cité Manifeste, I nevertheless felt I had to – despite not really wanting to. What I wanted was to do what I had intended to do all along – strolling through the streets and let my mind and my eyes wander and wonder. And so I went from focusing on what was on my mind to observing what my eyes were showing me. After a while the Cité Manifeste took a backseat in my consciousness.

Some time later, I entered a Monoprix, where I intended to buy a Brut aftershave. All of a sudden, my mind had another focus. When I could not find the aftershave, I asked one of the young saleswoman, who let me know that her father was also using it. This however did not lead her to locating it. Instead, she suggested another one that her father was also fond of – and which I then decided to buy.

By the way, my preferred focus lies in front of my nose, as the above pics hopefully illustrate.